My Father…

There’s so many emotions, feelings, hard-ships linked to that one word father. It’s not an easy word for me to grasp or wrap my brain around, it’s a word that triggers emotions and pain. It doesn’t take a man that gives you life to make a father, a father isn’t a man that is abusive, it’s not a man that never once told you that he loved you, it’s not a man that continued to never wish you happy birthday, it’s not a man that hit you and left bruises, it’s not a man that called you stupid or belittled you whenever there was an opportunity, it’s not a man that literally controlled your life for so long that you are afraid of so many things in life now. There are still times I can’t sleep because I’m afraid, times I have flashbacks and times I cry. But he does not control me anymore and I am free with gods love, I will continue to overcome my circumstances and I will succeed at all my goals in life. It’s an obstacle and God has taught me through so many men in my life what a father really looks like, a father is a man that simply loved unconditionally, a man that is your biggest supporter, one that wants you to succeed, one that wants you to grow and love and one that cares about you all of there life. This will be the type of man my daughters one day have.

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